On Finding Fulfillment

My first job out of college was as a Senior Operations Associate working for a financial company in Massachusetts, where I eventually shed many frustrated tears. I wanted to be a creative writer, not share in the same dream of the other dozen team members with whom I started at the company—to be a leading monetary wizard. Where others found gratification, I found a straight path to dissatisfaction.

Why did I settle for something so apparently astray from where I wanted to be? Money. I needed the green bills and this company gave them to me. I had a new, shiny, red car in the driveway and a lovely three bedroom apartment for which to pay. I succumbed to the lure of comfort, which resulted in many sleepless nights, wallowing in useless self-pity and drowning in relentless tears. The need for money was my obstacle. It forced me on a path on which I didn’t want to be.

When I measured my dream against my reality the two were remotely off. The problem was that there were few positions available as a writer that did not require solid experience—something I did not have. There seemed to be no answer--no way to “break in.” On one of our long hikes, my husband turned to me and asked, “Isn’t a writer supposed to write?” Fueled by my laborious trek up the mountain and a biting need to defend myself, I answered quite hastily, “I don’t have time to waste on foolish dreams. How am I supposed to carve out time to write when I have to concentrate on cleaning, grocery shopping, and oh yeah, working?” His patient reply was, “You shouldn’t feel guilty. Write to help others--not yourself.”

His words still echo in my mind, even as I type this note to you. How could I argue that I was wasting my time if I was spending that time communicating with others, right? And so began my writing journey. The focus of my writing was, and still is, fueled by my pure love of contribution.

I learned, through my husband, that to stand for something requires action—oftentimes selfless action. By serving readers, I discovered the most amazing result—fulfillment and purpose. If you want to be something, you must become that something. To ‘talk’ about it is not merely enough. You must ‘do’ it. Take this season of rebirth and use it as a revitalizing starting point to begin ‘doing’ something more fulfilling.

Spring is the season for fresh ideas and growth. Ursula Michael has designed “Brilliant Blooms” to help steer us on the path to greater creative fulfillment.

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